This week something that made me nervous was that I don’t know where I am living next year. Because I was sick, and my friend who I am supposed to live with next year was out of town we submitted the lease 2 hours too late. In otherwords, someone signed the lease right before us. This has made me extremely nervous this week as I do not not know where I am living next year. Being that safety, location, and cost are 3 things that dictate where I live, my options are limited. Being in Los Angeles everything is so expensive. In addition to the cost being outrageous, a lot of options that are available are not in an ideal location making school less convenient and accessible. Lastly, living in South Los Angeles is not the safest place in the world, especially as a girl, therefore further limiting my options based on preferences. I have really bad anxiety, and social anxiety on an every day basis, but this situation has caused an added amount of immense amount of anxiety because at this point I do not really feel like it is in my control- I feel like it is a waiting game to see if any apartments open up or if any roommates drop out at the last minute. Furthermore, I am anxious about how I am going to tell my friend if an option for 1 person is presented to me. I do not want to hurt her feelings, but I also do not want her to be mad at me.
Something else that has made me really anxious is yesterday morning I found out one of my best friends has cancer. Having just lost my grandfather to cancer it has been really hard for me to imagine my friend having cancer. I am really worried about her as her cancer is in a pretty severe stage and I want her to be ok.
Cause I am naturally a really anxious person I have been trying to learn new ways in order to cope with my anxiety I struggle with on an everyday basis. I am trying to be less critical on myself and show myself grace. I have also noticed when I am anxious that going on walks and listening to music also helps to ease my anxiety.